Power And Your Grandchildren

I was thinking about this blog this morning. I was specifically thinking about the word ‘powerful.’ I thought maybe I’d better be clearer about what I mean by this word.

I don’t mean the kind of power that people use to overpower someone else, like your grandchildren. I mean standing filled with your personal power and by that very stance empowering others, like your grandchildren to be filled with their own personal power. Then you both interact like that together.

This is one of the things I mean by ‘powerful’ in this blog. You do this by knowing what matters to you each moment and staying true to that.  You want and encourage that same act of power in others, like your grandchildren.

For example, let’ say you took your two young grandsons to play in the nearby park. All the swings are being used except one. They both run over and both try to get on the swing at the same time.

They are both pulling on the chains and announcing that they got there first and it’s their turn. Let’s say you want to introduce them to the Power of Respect. You want to start cooperation and discourage fighting.

Go over to them and ask, “Does anyone want some help?” Chances are almost 100% that one of them, if not both of them, is going to try to get you as their ally. They want you to help them have the first turn.

“Let me hold the chains and let’s figure this out. So you each think you should have the first turn. Right?” At this point they’ll probably try to explain, at the same time, why they deserve the first turn.

Then let them know that each of them is a very important person, and that you think that together you can figure out something that both of them like.

This is when you do the 7-step strategy (available for free if you go to www.parentchildteacher.com/free.html and get the free book)

It helps if you carry a small notebook and pen in your purse for just such situations. After a few sessions with this strategy, maybe even just one, your grandsons won’t need your help to find mutually agreeable solutions.

It makes so much sense to kids that each one of them is important. They love discovering that they can work out things out in ways that work for them both.

This is what I mean by being powerful.

I remember one time when I was working as head teacher in Children’s House, our Montessori school. I had already introduced the 7-step strategy. I noticed two children conflicting over something. I came up to them and took my notebook out of my pocket.

The children saw me coming. They looked at each other. Then one said, “Ok, you can go first if I can hold your bear.” Then they ran out into the play yard . They had mastered the essence of the strategy. They had only had a couple of lessons, but they no longer needed or wanted the long version. Conflict had ended for them. Harmony took its place.

I was using my power and they had claimed their’s. The power to create and live in harmony.

Trouble Between Adult Kids And Grandkids

It can be hard and heartbreaking when your own kids and your grandkids are having troubles getting along.

Here is another area where grandparents can be powerful. They can be a powerful force for healing for their kids and grandkids.

I know that often grandparents don’t want to ‘interfere.’ I also know that often their kids or kids-in-law resent ‘interference.’

That’s where the Power of Respect comes in. If you learn how to make respect your foundation when you are relating to your kids or grandkids, it can cut through both of those attitudes.

It does this because it is empowering to everyone involved. It puts everyone in the seat of power. Everyone gets to feel good and get their needs met. Imagine bringing a gift like that to your family!

You can even all learn to do this together at a Power of Respect Vacation. Imagine…healing, harmony and fun for all while getting the tools, and learning the skills and strategies, and developing the attitude to maintain this.

Does it get better than that? Yes! When you are back to your daily life and everyone is still getting their needs met and getting along well with others.

I know that it seems strange that it could happen so fast, and it may not…but it has happened that fast and it is sure to happen when you apply the tools, skills and strategies of the Power of Respect.

Check out my blogs powerofrespect and kvryce to learn more, both are on wordpress.

Grandparents And Beloved Grandkids

We can’t help but love our grandkids. They are treasured beings in our lives. We always want the best for them, how difficult, gut wrenching and heartbreaking it can be when things go wrong with and for them.

During these times, it can help them to know that you are there for them, loving them and believing in them. It can help ease their pain and give them a sense of security that may otherwise be threatened and shaky.

Your love and belief in them can help them maintain or even develop their self-seteem. Troubles and problems in their lives can make it hard to find a safe haven. There may be troubles at home. There may be trouble with their peers. There may be troubles at school. You can be their sanctuary.

When you make respect the foundation of your relationship with your grandkids, then the love you feel for them reaches them and nourishes them. That foundation keeps you from doing or saying things that make them feel unloved.

Never doing or saying anything that is not respectful helps create harmony between you and your grandkids. This makes you an excellent example of  how to live harmoniously with others. From you, your grandkids can learn the skills and attitudes that can help them live full and satisfying lives…in spite of other troubles.

This is one of the ways to be powerful.

Welcome To Powerful Grandparent

Hi, Powerful Grandparent!

Here you are going to be able to read and write about using our powers to create harmony in our worlds. That is my goal.

I very recently realized what a great position of power we are in. We can not only positively influence ourselves…we can positively influence our beloved grandkids (I feel the need to explain that ‘kids’ included children and teens, that’s why I use it)…we can positively influence our adult kids…we can positively influence the relationship between our adult kids and their kids…

These are the areas of positive influence I intend to focus on, although there are many more…whatever interests you and increases the good feelings in the world is a good way to go.